I exist everywhere and nowhere all at once. And it's blurry. And I like to stick my tongue out at you. It's just my way.
11. I recently returned from Los Angeles and it was overall a great experience. I think my host was less excited once I actually arrived in relative comparison to the pre-trip excitement. Like most things in life, the actual event rarely matches up with the hype and God knows I am probably more hype than substance at times. Having said that, it was quietly one of the best trips I've ever taken. I stayed so far outside the stereotypical version of Los Angeles that had stapled itself to my brain. And I found a peace I hadn't felt in ages--to the point that any anxiety I felt was generated by the mere fact that I was clearly a visitor and almost felt unworthy of the "coolness" I had found. And I don't mean in any way to suggest that the city or its people were snobbish or off-putting--in fact, it was quite the opposite. For a weekend, I watched very little television (a few DVD episodes of "The West Wing" were the lone exception), I walked almost everywhere, I ate great food, I cooked, I spent time on the beach, a great book store, a Dodger game, drank a little, went to an observatory, and just listened--to my friend, to the different languages people spoke, to the sounds of the beach and the city. It was beautiful and thought-provoking and I was in the unique circumstance of knowing I didn't belong but yet feeling a welcome guest by the entirety of the city. I would have liked more time but am somehow glad I didn't get more. When I arrived at the airport, a tangible sadness fell over me and I contemplated how my life could have taken so many directions while wondering if I was too fearful of change and whatever and all that shit. Who knows? I was probably just frustrated from being hard up. For me, the complexities of my consternation are typically rooted in the simplicity of needing to get laid more than I do.
12. So I'm thinking about moving for the first time in years. This is not the same thing as saying that I'm "considering moving" which implies that I've got a decision in front of me and an alternative choice of residence in mind. However, all this travel in the last year has confirmed that I still love Oklahoma City, but that I could be fine in some other place as well. So I think and fantasize and daydream of Chicago or Austin or LA and in all these scenarios the issue outlined at the end of #11 is of course magically solved and I have a kickass place and instantly make new, intellectual and witty friends and we hang out at my place and drink wine and discuss important issues and marvel at how choice my record collection is all while musing over liberal politics and the latest independent film that's only in limited release in like four cities (including the one I'm in) and I cook more and start jogging and reading UTNE and non-fiction accounts of war-torn countries thousands of miles away and blah blah fucking blah. And then I come right back to my old adage about not wanting to move unless I have a compelling reason to. Of course, I don't have a ton of compelling reasons to stay outside of my friends who are all starting to get into serious relationships and get married and all that shit and don't worry Rob, we'll still hang out and it won't be different but it always is and I get it even if I sorta resent it and--you know. All that. The moral of the story? I need more compelling reasons regarding my existence that have nothing to do with geography.
13. On a much happier note, I'm pretty sure I've fallen for the girl of my dreams. Many of you who read this know who I'm talking about. You also know that she's currently with some other guy, but don't worry about that. I don't think it's that serious and I feel like I'm winning her over slowly. A couple weeks ago, she came to my place for the first time. At the end of the night, she told me that I had the softest toilet paper and thought that that was SO cool. Baby steps. Baby steps.
14. From September 21st to October 6th, a span of fifteen days, I will have stayed in every mainland US time zone. As I type this, I am in San Francisco, California (ok, Oakland for tonight but San Francisco starting tomorrow). Somehow, I feel I get younger every time I travel west. It's just science.
15. Thursday will mark one year since I started this job. I have traveled approximately 40,000+ miles--not including car miles--since I started this job. I have really grown to love my job, but that's not really what is on my mind at this moment. The REAL question has to do with where I should travel to using all my frequent flier miles. The two choices at the top of the list? England and Argentina. Discuss real hard.
I am a sleepy little robot. In the real world, it's late. In California, it's kinda late but not as late. It's really more math than I care to do right now. Besides, being cool is a full-time job and takes all my Latino magical powers. I'm supposed to be doing expense reports right now. Here's an expense report for ya: Damn I'm money.
11. I recently returned from Los Angeles and it was overall a great experience. I think my host was less excited once I actually arrived in relative comparison to the pre-trip excitement. Like most things in life, the actual event rarely matches up with the hype and God knows I am probably more hype than substance at times. Having said that, it was quietly one of the best trips I've ever taken. I stayed so far outside the stereotypical version of Los Angeles that had stapled itself to my brain. And I found a peace I hadn't felt in ages--to the point that any anxiety I felt was generated by the mere fact that I was clearly a visitor and almost felt unworthy of the "coolness" I had found. And I don't mean in any way to suggest that the city or its people were snobbish or off-putting--in fact, it was quite the opposite. For a weekend, I watched very little television (a few DVD episodes of "The West Wing" were the lone exception), I walked almost everywhere, I ate great food, I cooked, I spent time on the beach, a great book store, a Dodger game, drank a little, went to an observatory, and just listened--to my friend, to the different languages people spoke, to the sounds of the beach and the city. It was beautiful and thought-provoking and I was in the unique circumstance of knowing I didn't belong but yet feeling a welcome guest by the entirety of the city. I would have liked more time but am somehow glad I didn't get more. When I arrived at the airport, a tangible sadness fell over me and I contemplated how my life could have taken so many directions while wondering if I was too fearful of change and whatever and all that shit. Who knows? I was probably just frustrated from being hard up. For me, the complexities of my consternation are typically rooted in the simplicity of needing to get laid more than I do.
12. So I'm thinking about moving for the first time in years. This is not the same thing as saying that I'm "considering moving" which implies that I've got a decision in front of me and an alternative choice of residence in mind. However, all this travel in the last year has confirmed that I still love Oklahoma City, but that I could be fine in some other place as well. So I think and fantasize and daydream of Chicago or Austin or LA and in all these scenarios the issue outlined at the end of #11 is of course magically solved and I have a kickass place and instantly make new, intellectual and witty friends and we hang out at my place and drink wine and discuss important issues and marvel at how choice my record collection is all while musing over liberal politics and the latest independent film that's only in limited release in like four cities (including the one I'm in) and I cook more and start jogging and reading UTNE and non-fiction accounts of war-torn countries thousands of miles away and blah blah fucking blah. And then I come right back to my old adage about not wanting to move unless I have a compelling reason to. Of course, I don't have a ton of compelling reasons to stay outside of my friends who are all starting to get into serious relationships and get married and all that shit and don't worry Rob, we'll still hang out and it won't be different but it always is and I get it even if I sorta resent it and--you know. All that. The moral of the story? I need more compelling reasons regarding my existence that have nothing to do with geography.
13. On a much happier note, I'm pretty sure I've fallen for the girl of my dreams. Many of you who read this know who I'm talking about. You also know that she's currently with some other guy, but don't worry about that. I don't think it's that serious and I feel like I'm winning her over slowly. A couple weeks ago, she came to my place for the first time. At the end of the night, she told me that I had the softest toilet paper and thought that that was SO cool. Baby steps. Baby steps.
14. From September 21st to October 6th, a span of fifteen days, I will have stayed in every mainland US time zone. As I type this, I am in San Francisco, California (ok, Oakland for tonight but San Francisco starting tomorrow). Somehow, I feel I get younger every time I travel west. It's just science.
15. Thursday will mark one year since I started this job. I have traveled approximately 40,000+ miles--not including car miles--since I started this job. I have really grown to love my job, but that's not really what is on my mind at this moment. The REAL question has to do with where I should travel to using all my frequent flier miles. The two choices at the top of the list? England and Argentina. Discuss real hard.
I am a sleepy little robot. In the real world, it's late. In California, it's kinda late but not as late. It's really more math than I care to do right now. Besides, being cool is a full-time job and takes all my Latino magical powers. I'm supposed to be doing expense reports right now. Here's an expense report for ya: Damn I'm money.
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